Nowadays we hear a lot on social media about showing compassion to ourselves and having a self-care day, but what’s the difference between self-love and self-care? And why would these be important for our children? Let’s find out in this article.
First, let’s start by distinguishing self-love and self-care as terms. Self-love is defined as having a positive perception of oneself while cultivating a positive connection with one’s emotions and personal identity. It is fundamentally a mindset or attitude towards yourself. Self-love is similar to having good self-esteem, which forms the basis of how we relate to others.
On the other hand, self-care is defined as taking intentional steps through mindful practices to maintain our physical, mental, and emotional health. It is a practice or behaviour that eventually becomes a habit. Self-care is a part of expressing self-love – you love and respect yourself by taking care of your needs.
So why are these things important for your children? Fostering self-love empowers children to face challenges with greater confidence and have an optimistic outlook in life, while teaching children self-care helps them to develop good habits and be responsible for meeting their own needs. By teaching children to take care of themselves and develop their confidence through positive reinforcement, we can help them become strong individuals.
Let’s look at some of the ways we can promote self-care and self-love in children:
1. Embrace uniqueness
Embracing your child’s uniqueness helps them develop a positive self-image. You can do this by encouraging your child to explore their interests and conveying the message that imperfections are a part of being human – mistakes are okay! Instead of making critical comments that highlight your child’s lack or weakness (“your hair always looks so sloppy”), affirm their strengths and encourage them to fulfill their potential (“You have such lovely hair, if you took care of it you would look even better!”).
2. Teach self-respect
A crucial step in child development includes teaching them the importance of self-respect. Demonstrate self-respect by valuing your own needs, setting boundaries, and treating yourself with kindness and compassion. This can be helpful for children who struggle with perfectionist tendencies, as your example shows them how to slow down and value themselves above what they achieve.
3. Adopt a positive mindset
Children may struggle with failures and challenges in life, but how they handle each setback makes a huge difference to their self-esteem. Teach your child to view problems as opportunities for learning and personal growth rather than causes for self-pity or self-blame. This growth mindset helps prepare them for future success and strengthens their resilience. A good question to ask children when they face failure is “What can we learn from this?”.
4. Promote physical health
The mind cannot function without the body, so the first step in taking care of our whole being is to maintain good physical health. Guide your children towards healthier lifestyles by promoting practices such as maintaining proper hygiene, eating regularly and healthily, and getting sufficient rest.
5. Learn to manage emotions
It is essential for children to recognise and manage their emotions so that they can maintain good mental health. Encouraging them to express their feelings honestly and appropriately without fear of judgement and teaching them healthy coping strategies, such as deep breathing exercises or journalling, can help them manage stressful situations. When children take responsibility for acknowledging and managing how they feel emotionally, they start learning the value of prioritising psychological wellness.
6. Encourage reflection and self-awareness
Reflection and self-awareness help children to recognise both their talents and areas for improvement. Through constructive feedback, they can develop an understanding that any perceived flaws are opportunities for growth and improvement.
Situations in life can be good chances to prompt your child to examine themselves. For example, if your child loses in a sports game and gets upset, you can encourage them to take a moment to reflect on and feel their emotions, then find positive ways to move forward.
Building the Foundation for Self-Care and Self-Love
At New Life Student Care Teck Whye (near Choa Chu Kang), we aim to nurture children to be independent and confident individuals with good socio-emotional skills. Hence we help children gain confidence and discipline through self-love, self-care and teaching good character values. However, families are the main factor in building a child’s self-esteem and confidence. We hope that this article helps you to create a safe, supportive environment for your child to learn self-love and self-care habits.